You can do it!
Posted on 19th January 2018 at 09:57
Today’s blog is something that was inspired, as a lot of the things in my life are, by my children.
This is the next blog in my series where I read from my beautiful book “Get Happy” and talk to you in a bit more detail about that message.
Today’s blog is something that was inspired, as a lot of the things in my life are, by my children because – oh my lord – they teach me more than anybody else in the entire world has ever taught me. This is entry 59 in my book, enjoy….
Hello folks! I am going to the park in my post today.
My eldest daughter has a bit of an obsession with the monkey bars. She has been attempting to master them for about a year now. To start with, she could just about hang on to the first one before dropping onto the ground. Gradually she managed to swing to the second one before dropping and so on. It’s taken a while.
She has experienced various emotions throughout her monkey bar journey. Frustration, fear, anger and jubilation, to name but a few. She has never given up and we have encouraged her, praised her efforts and assured her that she absolutely can do it.
Whenever we go to a park, the first thing she asks is if there are monkey bars there and can she go on them? They are the first things she runs to and has a go on. She has been utterly determined to master them.
A little while ago we went to the park and suddenly she managed to swing all the way across, no fuss, no nonsense. She was so pleased with herself. It had all finally clicked into place. She got her technique right and it now works every time.
Let me summarise the analogy for you:
If there is something you want, keep going.
Allow yourself to experience all the emotions involved.
Learn from them.
Tell yourself how well you are doing.
It might take longer than you think, but believe you can get there.
As I say, another lesson from my beautiful daughters. Francesca, that’s my eldest daughter, was six or seven at the time that I wrote this. She was absolutely determined. She badly wanted to do the monkey bars. I have no idea why she wanted to do the monkey bars but she badly badly wanted to do the monkey bars. She was tiny and they are hard, monkey bars! They’re hard, it’s all upper body strength and it’s hard going and you have to get the technique right. You have to swing first and she would launch herself on and then sort of hang there and think, “How on earth am I going to get to the next one?”
And every time that she did it, she got a little bit better. And every time she did it, she learnt another lesson. She learnt not to hang there. She learnt to try and move quickly. She learnt to swing her legs. She learnt to propel herself forward. Every time she tried it, and she was so determined, she wanted to do it so badly, she was so determined to do it that eventually it was impossible not to. There was no way she wasn’t ever going to do it, if that makes sense.
But I think that determination gets knocked out of us a bit as we get older and this is what I mean about my children giving me so many lessons, I think that determination gets knocked out of us a bit. I think we get so bogged down in not believing. There was no question in her mind whether she could do it. She knew she would do it eventually; she just had to keep going. She just had to keep trying.
We encouraged her, obviously, but she got frustrated and she got annoyed. “Aarrrggh! Why isn’t it working? Why can’t I do it?” And then when she would do two or three in a row she would say, “Yay! Look how many I did! Hooray!” She would celebrate it. But she absolutely knew that she wanted to do it and she absolutely knew that if she kept practicing, if she kept going, she would get there. She could do it.
And I think those things get knocked out of us as we get older and I think very much, that we start from a position of not believing that we can. “I want this thing, but I probably won’t get it.” And, “I want to be able to do this, but I probably won’t be able to.” Or, “I would really love to, it would be ace if I could, but it’s not very realistic, is it?”
That whole monkey bars experience, for me, really showed me, really revealed to me, the power of determination, the power of belief, the power that you believe something is possible even if you are rubbish at it to start with. You believe it is possible and you keep going and you will achieve it. It is impossible for it not to be possible.
And I have seen that in my own life a thousand times, but really particularly recently because I have certain goals, for my company for instance. I have goals that I want to reach and I have had the same goals for a couple of years now. And last year I did get a bit ‘grrr’ about them because it wasn’t happening. I needed a kick up the bum. I needed a reminder that actually you can’t skip the steps. I have just quoted a man called Croz Crossley – look him up, he is awesome.
Francesca couldn’t go from never having done monkey bars before, to suddenly swinging across in one go. That is not going to happen. It’s utterly impossible. But if she kept going and tried and got to two or three and dropped and then the next time got to four monkey bars and drop and then maybe back to three and drop and then maybe up to five and drop. You can’t skip the steps.
And if you stop trying to skip the steps, stop trying to go from a company that earns a little bit to a multi-million pound turnover company in five seconds flat, stop trying to go from nothing to everything in one go and keep hold of that determination and keep hold of the belief that if you follow every little step, it will happen. It can’t not. You have to go through the steps. The steps are important. They teach you things – it’s how you learn, it’s how you grow, it’s how you expand and develop and they are important
So my message for you today is: You can do it. You can absolutely get there. There’s no shadow of a doubt that you can get there. 100% you can get there. Just like my beautiful girl did on the monkey bars. You take it step by step by step. Yes you’ll get annoyed. Yes you’ll get frustrated. Yes you’ll get angry. Yes you’ll have moments of jubilation and they will all be mixed in together. But the important bit is that you believe you can get there, that you believe that it is possible, which she absolutely did. You have the determination to keep going and those two things combined mean it’s an absolute guarantee that you will get there. The length of time it takes you might vary, but you will absolutely get there.
So. Go be determined. Go believe in what you want. Believe it’s possible because it absolutely is. 100%. Be determined to get there. Follow the steps, don’t try and skip them. Don’t try and take a shortcut, and you will get there.
You can do it.
If you would like to find out more about my Happiness Club and how it can help you please click here: www.aboutthehappinessclub.com
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